Single and Whole
Whether you are single because you are divorced, widowed or simply have yet to connect with Mr. or Ms. Right, I urge you to cherish the life you have been blessed with. Contrary to popular belief you are not half of a person because you are not married. You are complete in God, and set aside for His use. In this season in your life, realize your God-given uniqueness in the eyes of your Heavenly Father. There is no one else in the world just like you. And while you may not have discovered it fully, God has a specific plan and purpose for your life, no matter your age. There is something you can do, a void only you can fill. If you are not enjoying your singleness, and seeking God’s will for your life, you are doing yourself and others an injustice. This could be one of the best and most fruitful times of your life if you would wholeheartedly embrace it and allow God to use you to be a blessing in the lives of others.
It is not unusual for singles, especially Christian singles, to feel pressured to be in a relationship. Society, through entertainment and the media, depicts the life of a Christian single as lonely and boring. Many Christian singles say other Christians make them feel like outcasts as well. However, Paul who wrote a large portion of the New Testament was happy being single—even Jesus was single!
Your life as a single Christian doesn’t have to be filled with gloom. Look around. There are plenty of happy and fulfilled single Christians out there, so there is no excuse. If you are not doing so, start living your life to the fullest today!
Refuse to accept a warped view of the single life. You have advantages according to the Word of God. Speaking of Paul, he said the single man or woman can be completely devoted to the things of God. Married people must divide their time with family obligations (1 Corinthians 7:33, 34). In addition, a single person has more freedom to explore interests and hobbies without neglecting marital duties.
If you maintain a godly perspective about being single, you will gain confidence. And confidence in knowing who you are in Christ will help you attract the right people in your life. When you keep your thoughts in line with the Word, worldly temptations and pressures subside, inferiority and intimidation vanishes. The desperation to be in a relationship disappears. Why? Because you begin to understand that only God can bring true fulfillment to your life. It is only when you establish your relationship with Him that you are ready to establish healthy relationships with others. In the meantime, here are a few ways to enjoy your season of singleness:
- Write a list of characteristics and qualities that make you a unique person, and ask the Holy Spirit to help you think of some.
- Make cultivating your relationship with God your first priority.
- Discover His plan and purpose for your life.
- Find a place in which you can use the grace He has placed on your life. For example, find a place to serve in your church and/or community.
- Take up an interesting hobby.
- Cultivate a skill or talent.
- Spend time with positive people who inspire and uplift you.
Know that you can be whole regardless of your marital status. Be at peace knowing that if you allow Him, God can help you enjoy this time of your life.
